Dear Triathlon,
Thank you. Thank you for challenging me. Thank you for
helping me grow. Thank you for every single experience you provided me; the
people met, the places travelled, the accomplishments and the setbacks. Thank
you for the friendships that will last long beyond triathlon. Thank you even
for the injuries, and for the illnesses. Thank you for helping me find within
myself, a strength to keep trying, in those moments when I didn’t think I could
or didn’t think I should.
Thank you, triathlon, for surrounding me with amazing
people; for my coach, Warwick Dalziel, and for the supportive and collaborative
training squad that he fosters. Thank you, Warwick for treating all your
athletes as people, realising that getting the best out of an athlete means
understanding what makes them tick as people. Thank you for being an
intelligent coach who taught me so many skills that I will rely on, well after
triathlon. You taught me to roll with disappointments, to learn from them
certainly but to continue with the process and to trust in it no matter the
small knocks along the way. Nothing is linear. Those comforting words after a
less than desirable result - “nothing changes”. Those same words too after a
breakthrough performance because the reality is, we continue with the process
no matter the outcome, always chipping away to be better. Your even temperament
whether we win or lose (as long as we’ve done our best), is rare in sport, and
it is a real gift for any athlete fortunate to be in your stable. Thank you. Thank
you, Jarrod, for starting me in this sport of Elite triathlon back in 2012.
Thank you for challenging me in so many ways, constantly forcing me out of my
comfort zone. Our Endurance Team family was special and will always be a
cherished first chapter in my pro triathlon journey.
Thank you to my training partners from all over the
globe. To the ones I’ve trained alongside for years, and others for only a few
sessions – you all brought something to my journey and for that, I am so
thankful. Many of you are still close friends regardless of whether you are
still in the sport, and I know these friendships will last long after I too
leave the sport. To the younger girls in Warwick’s squad, keep being awesome,
keep being supportive of one another. What you have as a group is something
truly special and it will be your greatest asset on your path to reaching each
of your individual potentials. Continue to push, encourage and support each
other just as you have been doing and you will all continue to flourish; every
single one of you.
Thank you, triathlon, for the highs. Thank you for
those moments – no matter how few and far between – when all the hard work came
to fruition, when the result actually reflected the training. Thank you for my
ITU Conti Cup win in 2014 even though I didn’t appreciate it at the time. If I
could have my time again, I wouldn’t take it for granted like I did then. Thank
you for teaching me that valuable lesson such that when I finished on the
podium again in 2015, with the fastest run time of the day and my fastest 10km run time too, I was able
to recognise it for the good day it was. Thank you for my 2nd place
in my third professional half ironman attempt, when I knew how special it was
after a race setback only four weeks prior. Thank you for another podium, this
time in Asia, where I placed 2nd behind someone who had been such a
good friend to me when I first started in international triathlon. The only thing
better than a podium performance, is sharing those podiums with friends. And thank
you, triathlon, for helping the little junior runner in me, achieve a childhood
dream of qualifying to represent my country at a Professional World
Championship.
Thank you, triathlon, for meaning so much to me that
you could also cause me such despair. I’ve shed tears for you in the
Philippines, Japan and Spain when illness forced me out of key races at crucial
times. You gutted me when I had ridden out of my skin into 3rd place
in Poland in one of my first 70.3 distance races, and a tack on the road
pierced my back tyre at 83km (out of 90km). You frustrated me in 2014 when I
gave my all to swimming but I felt like I was banging my head against a brick
wall. You made me feel helpless and angry when I couldn’t race on my TT bike
without debilitating pain in my lower back and left leg in early 2018. I’ve
felt the heartache and agony of being cleared to run again post injury, only to
feel the same excruciating pain after just 20 seconds of running again. I’ve
driven home from the doctor in tears, and then agonised, waiting for a stress echocardiogram
to determine the nature of a heart murmur. Every set back brought with it the
question of whether I should keep going or return to the world of Investment
Banking, but every time, I chose you, triathlon. I chose to keep going. Through
all this pain, I feel so lucky to have found something that I have loved that much. Thank you, triathlon, for
finding me, and for having on me, the impact that you have had.
Thank you for the corners of the world I’ve seen
thanks to you: From the small fishing town of Gdynia on the Baltic sea, in
Poland, to the remote lakeside community of Egirdir in Turkey where we feasted post-race
on Baklava. I’ve fallen off a treadmill doing race preparation in South Africa,
and battled airline staff regarding lost bikes in Mauritius. I’ve raced in a
World Cup in the pristine waters of Cozumel, Mexico and have crashed my bike in
torrential rain and flooding before a World Cup in Cartagena, Colombia. I’ve
ridden back from a race in midday traffic through midtown, Manhattan. I’ve
caught trains for hours through countryside Taiwan and Japan, en route to
races. I’ve enjoyed post-race Rosé in Marseille, France, post-race wiener
schnitzel in Zurich, Switzerland, and succumbed to post-race gastro in Liuzhou,
China (twice!). I’ve bonded with friends and met new friends through the
desperate rehydration process of post-race drug testing in far flung parts of
the world. I’ve been fortunate to call Vitoria-Gasteiz, Spain, home for 3
months of each year since 2014, and found a second home at Café Taza after
long, hilly rides in the Spanish sun.
Thank you, triathlon, for also showing me personality
traits I hope never to see in myself. Thank you for exposing me to a sad, small
number of people who opt for cutting others down rather than supporting and
encouraging them – my biggest belief has always been that our competitors, our
training partners and friends in the sport, are truly our best asset, as they are what will help us along the
most, making us all better. We are each other’s best chance of
reaching our own potential. Supporting and encouraging someone else will not
hinder your own success at all. Some people unfortunately view their own
success and the success of someone else as mutually exclusive events. They aren’t
and you won’t be slowed down by helping and supporting someone else.
Thank you for lining up the circumstances that became
the impetus for me to chase another childhood dream. I had dreamt of studying an
MBA since I was in my mid-teens but when I began the triathlon journey so late
in life, I believed that triathlon was my sabbatical from full time work, that
I had made my choice and that it meant no MBA. Thank you, triathlon, for
teaching me to control my own destiny, to channel my irritation at others into
living my best life. Provoked, I
ordered a GMAT text book in late 2017 and controlled that which I could control,
beginning the path to MBA applications. Thank you too, triathlon, for giving me
the courage to shoot for the moon, to apply to the business schools I dreamt of
attending but didn’t truly believe I could get in to. Thank you for challenging
me and my values so much over the last six years that I was able to write my
admissions essays knowing exactly who I am, and what I stand for. Thank you for
the hours on the bike in the Spanish mountains, giving me time to truly reflect
and work out exactly what I want from life, and what my career and life
ambitions are beyond triathlon.
Thank you, triathlon, for providing me enough setbacks
that when I received offers of admission from both Cambridge and INSEAD, I was overwhelmed
with appreciation. When both schools awarded me scholarships - the Forte
Fellowship at Cambridge and an INSEAD merit scholarship – I was overcome by shock
and disbelief. Thank you, triathlon, for ensuring constant humility, such that
achievements like these are now truly appreciated, and not for one second,
taken for granted.
Although I do have another partial triathlon season
left in 2019, now seems like the right time to reflect on what has been, and to
take the deep breath needed before launching into what will be a transition phase.
I will be racing in 2019, and I will be racing hard, but I will also be making
sure to enjoy the last part of what has been an unforgettable chapter of my
life. At the same time, I will be preparing for what lies ahead: In September, I
will pack a different set of bags. The bikes will be left behind, and in their
place, will be textbooks, a pair of cross-country spikes and lots of winter clothing.
For the first time in five years, I will have a winter and not just one but two
in a row. I will be bound for Cambridge
University, where I will continue my life-long love for running but the focus
will be on the academic. It will be the start of a new chapter. Like I did in
July of 2012, I will find myself at the beginning again.
Thank you, triathlon, for the good, the bad, and
everything in between.
